Mom's First Steps

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Learning how to recognize your baby’s cues

Before they are even able to speak, babies communicate through nonverbal cues such as facial expressions, body language, and sounds. Learning to recognize your baby’s cues can help you respond to their needs more quickly and efficiently, reduce crying, and avoid some of the frustration new parents feel when they want to help their crying baby but do not know exactly what their baby needs.

For me, this learning was borne out of desperation as a first time mom. My first born had long periods of relentless crying lasting an hour or more every evening from when she was about four weeks old until she was about twelve weeks old. My husband and I, both exhausted and at our wits end, wanted desperately to help her, but we couldn’t understand what she needed. I literally read the entire internet trying to figure out how to help her. She finally seemed to grow out of this right as I was able to confidently distinguish hunger from gas from tiredness. I always thought my first born was my fussiest baby, but I now question whether she was truly more fussy than the others or if I simply wasn’t able to understand her cues until much later. Armed with this knowledge for my latter three babies, the newborn phase was MUCH easier and involved much less crying. (Note - I did also learn a lot about The Witching Hour with my first borne. You might want to check out a post I wrote on that here.)

Learning to recognize these cues can lead to optimal growth, nutrition, and sleep for your baby, and it promotes a strong bond with your baby based on a foundation of positive, responsive care. Unlike me, you don’t have to read the entire internet - just take a look below.

Below, I’ve listed the characteristic cues that are common for most babies (some of these are reflexive, after all!). Importantly, these cues show up before the crying starts and so can be an early sign of your baby’s need. With time, you will become better at recognizing the exact cues for your own baby, and your confidence as a parent will grow as you are able to quickly assess what your baby needs at that moment.

Click the image to link to a short video with clips showing cues for hunger, gassy, and tiredness with my fourth baby.

Cues that baby is hungry:

  • Rooting Reflex (turning their head in search of breast or bottle)

  • Sucking on fingers or fist

  • Clenching hands

  • Smacking or licking lips

  • Increased activity with arms or legs

Cues that baby is tired:

  • Yawning

  • Rubbing eyes or ears

  • Reddening of eyebrows

  • Losing interest in toys or people

  • Not making eye contact

  • Fussing and showing irritability

Cues that baby is gassy:

  • Reddening of the face

  • Grimacing and scrunching of the face

  • Bringing knees up towards the chest

  • Squirming and cannot get comfortable

  • Refusal to feed or fussy while feeding

Now that you know about some of the most common baby cues, you’re ready to apply this knowledge to your own baby so that you can meet their needs faster and with more confidence. I encourage you to spend some time closely watching your baby to help you learn which of these cues are most telling for your baby. I sincerely hope that this information helps you and your family as much as it did mine!

If you found this article helpful, you’d probably also find our recent blog post about Understanding The Universal Baby Language just as beneficial. Understanding baby cues and baby sounds is an extremely effective combination that is bound to help you and your baby thrive.

If you’re struggling with baby sleep and want to understand how to apply principles of baby cues to improving your baby’s sleep gently and without crying, you should check out The Ultimate Guide To Better Baby Sleep.